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Jimmy Chitwood
Aug 13, 2013
Published in
The 2021 Fictitious Athlete Inductees
Honestly, in our opinion this is not as much of a lock as people would think. It is undeniable that without Jimmy Chitwood, Hickory High does not win the Indiana State Championship, or even makes a dent in that tournament. We will also say that without Chitwood stating that if Coach Norman Dale was fired, he would not rejoin the basketball team. However, that moment was one of the most passionless speeches uttered in a pivotal sports cinema moment. Even on the hardwood, we remember less of the montage of Chitwood jump shots as opposed to the diminutive Ollie making those two free throws in the previous game.
Still let us all remember this: Jimmy Chitwood showed us that when the star player wants a certain coach, he gets it. Come on NBA fans that sound familiar doesn’t it?
Jesus Shuttlesworth
Aug 12, 2013
Published in
The Athletes
Generally, when you take an active athlete and put him in a major movie, the results are disastrous (Shaquille O’Neal we are looking in your direction!), but Ray Allen gave a very earnest performance in Spike Lee’s “He Got Game”. The three point specialist played, Jesus Shuttlesworth (is that not a cool name or what?), who was widely recruited by multiple institutions to play hoops, and his father (Denzel Washington) was granted a week long sabbatical from prison to help convince him to play for the college of his Warden’s alma mater in return for a reduced prison stay. The highlight for us (and we are sure others) was the one on one game between Allen and Washington; which justified to us the casting of a non-actor in that role although, we have to say; what was the deal with that ending?
Jamal Jeffries/Juwanna Mann
Aug 13, 2013
Published in
The Athletes
Sports movies (especially Basketball) often have the common theme of the superstar athlete who has no concept of teamwork, become humbled and learn that being part of a successful group is better than being a successful individual. You know the cliché how there is no “I” in team? Basically Juwanna Mann took this premise and merged it with Tootsie, where star (and selfish of course) player Jamal Jeffries is kicked out of the league, and with no other options (again echoing NBA stars, he squandered his money), he pretended to be a woman and joined the women’s league. Let the hilarity ensue.
Sadly for Miguel A. Nunez, who is not a bad actor, this was his only shot as a leading man. Sure he got to play across from Vivica A. Fox, but most of his scenes were in drag; and with unfunny material throughout the picture, you have a cinematic sports turkey. It should be safe to say we have seen the last of transvestite basketball players in the films….we hope.
Jackie Moon
Aug 13, 2013
Published in
The Athletes
Will Farrell was at his comedic best as Jackie Moon in Semi-Pro as the Owner/Power Forward of the 1976 ABA Flint Tropics. Moon was a bungling owner who was able to purchase the team based on the royalties of his hit single, “Love Me Sexy”, a song he stole from his mother three weeks before she died. Moon worked hard with various gimmicks (all with poor success) to draw crowds with the hope of bringing the team into 4th place, a position that was promised an NBA birth in the impending merge between the two American Professional Basketball Leagues.
On the court, Moon was not a great player, but in a dream he had while unconscious in halftime in the final game, he is given a play by his dead mother (Patti LaBelle), called the “Alley-Oop” which helps them win the game and finish fourth, (although the ABA would not grant small market Flint a merge into the NBA). The character would actually do beer commercials that year, and we wager that this film will remain a sports classic for years to come.