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Judge Elihu Smails

Judge Smails
You have to hand it to Ted Knight who managed to portray Judge Elihu Smails as a character with no redeeming qualities and was easily the most pompous blowhard in sports cinema history. Considering that most people knew Knight as the bungling newscaster, Ted Baxter on the Mary Tyler Moore Show (which itself was one of the best television characters in the 1970’s) the fact that you immediately forgot his Emmy Award winning performances within the first words of Judge Smails.


Smails was the co-founder of the Bushwood Country Club that the common man (or even other rich men) despised. He was so unlikable that you could not imagine anyone hoping that Smails would win that $20,000 golf match against Al Czervic and Ty Webb. At least we think that even Lex Luthor had a fan somewhere?

The question here is does the golfer who Sergio Garcia would have passed over in a pairing for Tiger Woods have a place here?



The Bullet Points:
Movie Appeared:
Caddyshack (1980)

Actor:
Ted Knight

Why you should vote for him:
Sports villains don’t get much better than this.

Why you should not vote for him:
He lost because of a gopher. A gopher?

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Jean Girard

Jean Girard
We are trying to think of the possibility of an eccentric gay French race car driver will ever be the antagonist of a film again. That is worth something isn’t it?




The Bullet Points:
Movie Appeared:
Talladega Nights: The Legend of Ricky Bobby (2006)

Actor:
Sasha Baron Cohen

Position Portrayed:
Nascar Driver

Played for:
Dennit Racing Team

Why you should vote for him:
It was easily one of the most interesting sports villains ever.

Why you should not vote for him:
Maybe it was too far left field to be completely effective.

Greg Goldberg

Greg Goldberg
Take the fat uncoordinated smart ass kid and stick him in the goaltenders position, and watch the hilarity ensue. We guess that is the formula for Greg Goldberg, the unlikely backstopper for the Mighty Ducks franchise. As this is a film, we will try to forget the complete unlikelihood of this kid being able to stop a beachball let alone a puck.


Monica Wright

Monica Wright
If we never watch the WNBA, do we really care about a character in the WNBA? Can’t say we do.




The Bullet Points:
Movie Appeared:
Love and Basketball (2000)

Actor:
Sanaa Lathan

Position Portrayed:
Point Guard

Played for:
USC/Los Angeles Sparks

Why you should vote for her:
Um……..

Why you should not vote for her:
We stand by our WNBA analogy.