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Adrian Balboa

Was it her mousy look or mad skills at the pet store that attracted Rocky Balboa to her? For us, one of the great cinematic mysteries was what did Rocky see in Adrian, as she didn’t have money or looks, or even much of a personality that we could see due to her shyness. Her brother (Rocky’s best friend, Paulie treated her like crap) and other than look concerned when Rocky was fighting, we don’t know really remember much of anything else she did. Scratch that, we remember her confidence in screaming “You Can’t Win!” to Rocky when he needed…
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Clubber Lang

Rocky III may have been the movie where the Italian Stallion sold his soul to the box office, but it was also the flick that gave us one of the greatest fads of the 1980’s, Mr. T. He was far from a great actor, but he looked perfect as James “Clubber” Lang; the hardened fighter from Chicago who learned to box in prison. Actually, he was portrayed as someone who Rocky couldn’t beat at all. They never claimed in the original Rocky movie that Balboa was undefeated going into the initial match with Apollo Creed. In fact, Rocky’s record wasn’t…
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Coach Ernie Pantusso

This may sound morbid, but we kind of thought that “Cheers” improved after the death of Nicholas Colasanto and thus the death of “Coach” Ernie Pantusso. Ironically, this would usher in the character of Woody Boyd, who may not be a Fictitious Athlete Hall of Fame nominee, but his portrayer, Woody Harrelson, has given us many. ‘Coach” was a shade above (or maybe below) retarded, and based on an episode showcasing his ability to be hit by pitches (and to the head), we think he may have taken one too many, as his intelligence had to be constantly questioned. Still,…
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Fast Eddie Felson

The only Fictitious Athlete on the ballot who appeared before 1970, we had the opportunity to witness “Fast” Eddie Felson in “The Hustler” in 1961 and the sequel “The Color of Money” in 1986. A quarter of a century may have passed between the movies, but the similarities of brilliant performances by Paul Newman and layered storytelling make this a character we are thrilled to see at different stages of life. Now seriously, how many characters on this ballot (with the same actor we stress) can we say that about?
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Ivan Drago

“I must break you”. Decades later, and we still remember the roided up superfreak who was engineered in a Soviet laboratory to take down Rocky Balboa. We know that he did not succeed in that task, but this was the man who killed Apollo Creed in the ring and was married to a then hot Brigitte Nielsen, before she became the grotesque trainwreck that once pined over Flavor Flav. Sure, he was symbolic of “Communist evil” and the movie aged quickly with the spirit of Glasnost, but tell us you won’t watch it when it comes on cable!
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Sport Goofy

From what we can tell, the origin of Sport Goofy took place in the 1940’s with a short film, and multiple appearances would see him have a regular tv show in the 1980’s. Essentially, Sport Goofy was not necessarily a good athlete but the message here is about sportsmanship and not really about winning. Does this fly here? TV Show/Movie Appeared: Multiple appearances in comics, television and film. Actor/Actress: Multiple Voice Actors Why you should vote: In terms of a moral compass nobody can touch Sport Goofy Why you should not vote: What did he ever win?
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