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The Artists

Cyrus "Truth" DeBarge

Let’s look at this equation shall we? We have Cyrano De Bergerac meets lame Rap; and you don’t have to be much of a mathematician to know that this equals something that has no appeal to anyone beyond the age of ten. Ah, Disney, we thank you again. The Bullet Points: TV Movie Appeared: Let it Shine (2012) Actors: Tyler James Williams Songs you might remember: Let it Shine Why you should vote for him: The only valid reason was that this was the kid who starred in “Everybody Hates Chris”. We really liked that show Why you should not…
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Dandi and Pandi

Calling this movie horrible would be an insult to the word. From the 1980 “film” The Apple, Dandi and Pandi were an overly sequined duo singing what we assume was supposed to futuristic Glam Rock. The biracial pair helped seduce a country folk duo to the dark side so to speak, but in a movie this bad, does it really matter? The Bullet Points: TV Show Appeared: The Apple (1980) Actors: Allan Love (Dandi) Grace Kennedy (Pandi) Songs you might remember: Nothing Why you should vote for him them: We have no valid reason Why you should not vote for…
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Daniel Jensen

New Year’s Eve was one of the many attempts to do an ensemble Romantic Comedy film that just didn’t work. We wonder if someone were to ever come up with an equation for acting talent against movie quality if this film would have the largest chasm. One of the talents of the film, Jon Bon Jovi (Seriously, he isn’t a bad actor) played a rock star playing Times Square at New Year’s Eve. We can’t say we remember much of what he did, and we had to research the name of the song he sang, and we are positive we…
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Danny Fisher

Elvis Presley’s favorite role, and the one that many thought was his best, Elvis Presley played Danny Fisher in King Creole, a 1958 film that showed the King at his rebellious best. For what it is worth, if you have never seen an Elvis film, this is the one that we would recommend, and the one worth voting for the most.  With that said, how well have Elvis Presley movies aged, and how many people try to watch them today? The Bullet Points: Movie Appeared: King Creole (1958) Actor: Elvis Presley Songs you might remember: Crawfish Trouble Why you should…
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Danny Romalotti

The greatest Rock Star ever to come from Genoa City, Wisconsin (A place we love because it is fictitious!), Danny Romalotti apparently had a lot of hits, though we can’t say that we know any of them. He had a lot of concerts, though we aren’t sure who attended them. Michael Damian (who played Romalotto); actually hit number one with the David Essex cover, played “Rock On” in 1989. The Bullet Points: TV Show Appeared: Young and the Restless (1980-92) Actor: Michael Damian Songs you might remember: None Why you should vote for him: Does twelve years on the top…
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Darlene McBride

From Mad TV, we have Darlene McBride (Nicole Sullivan), the heavily made up, ultra right wing Country Singer who took hatemongering to a new level. The character appeared in multiple sketches over a four year period and we always thought that Nicole Sullivan was the MVP of that sketch comedy show, and that was enough for us to put her on the ballot. The Bullet Points: TV Show Appeared: Mad TV (1997-2001) Actor: Nicole Sullivan Songs you might remember: None Why you should vote for her: Perhaps you agree with us that Sullivan is the Mad TV MVP. Why you…
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Das Sound Machine

What is needed when you win a competition? You need to have to go international to take on the Germans of course! Okay, that is a little simplistic, but how often has the trope of beating “evil” foreigners been done in sequels? In Pitch Perfect 2, that is exactly what happens with the Barden Bellas as they represent their country to go against Das Sound Machine, the German winners of their national a capella competition. Do the Germans win? Of course not! However they were delightfully evil and what else do you need from antagonists?              The Bullet Points:…
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Dave Veltri

Steve Buscemi did another great cameo in “The Wedding Singer” where at the first wedding, Buscemi played the loser brother of the groom who commandeered a guitar and played horribly. He returned at the end of the film where he was a much more polished musician and played at Robbie Hart’s wedding. Maybe, Pop gave him those lessons after all! The Bullet Points: Movie Appeared: The Wedding Singer (1998) Actor: Steve Buscemi Songs you might remember: True Why you should vote for him: Buscemi’s cameo rocked. Why you should not vote for him: It was obvious that he was self-taught.…
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Deacon Dark

There was no way we could resist one! Years deep into his irrelevant stage, Sonny Bono did what all other B-listers did in 1979 and the early 80’s; he guest starred on the Love Boat. He played a Gene Simmons wannabe named Deacon Dark, who in true Love Boat fashion; fell in love with a deaf chick. Actually, that makes sense, as nobody who heard this dreck could possibly fall in love with him. The Bullet Points: TV Show Appeared: The Love Boat (1979) Actor: Sonny Bono Songs you might remember: Smash It Why you should vote for him: If…
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Dee Anderson

Hmm.Isn’t there always the “other one” in a trip of girl groups? In the movie Sparkle (2012) we nominated the three girls separately as we were treated to them more as individuals as opposed to a collective. That is except for the “other one”, being Dee. Look, the best example of this is that the best YouTube clip we have of her is when her portrayer (Tika Sumpter) was walking the red carpet; but hey somebody has to be the Michelle Williams of the group/movie. The Bullet Points: Movie Appeared: Sparkle (2012) Actor: Tika Sumpter Songs you might remember: None…on…
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Del Paxton

Played by great character actor, Bill Cobbs, Del Paxton was portrayed as top figure in the world of Jazz. His role was brief, but he met one of his biggest fans, the drummer for the Wonders, and his sage advice put things into perspective for the protagonist of “That Thing You Do”. Realistically, this is not a strong contender, but we loved this role so much, that we had to put on the ballot The Bullet Points: Movie Appeared: That Thing You Do (1996) Actor: Bill Cobbs Songs you might remember: None….just a jam with “Shades” Why you should vote…
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Denise Waverly

Played by the (is she hot or not?) Illeana Douglas, Grace of my Heart did not get a lot of attention, but it was a decent film that followed the career of Dennis Waverly (Douglas) through her singing and writing career in the 1960’s. This was a film that really explored the music of the 60’s and that really should mean something here. The Bullet Points: Movie Appeared: Grace of my Heart (1996) Actor: Illeana Douglas Songs you might remember: Multiple Why you should vote for her:   The film was really about the music. That defeats more than 90 percent…
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Dethklok

This one straddles real and fictitious that may blur the lines more than any other entry on the ballot. From the ambitious animated Adult Swim program, Metalocalypse, Dethklok is a very successful Death Metal band whose merchandising power is only equaled by their ineptitude in anything that is not musical. In the real world, the creator of the show and music (Brendon Small) has released four albums under the Dethklok name, and though they were not nearly as successful as they were in the animated world, he did several tours with a backing band performing Dethklok music. In our eyes,…
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Diamonds in the Rough

Jason Biggs never did have a film that worked other than the American Pie series, but Saving Silverman did have a bit of a life on cable as he played a man in a horrible relationship, whose two friends try to save him from. The trio (which included Jack Black and Steve Zahn) were also a Neil Diamond tribute band, and we saw more than enough of their performances to make them a dark horse candidate. Besides, with every passing year, Neil Diamond becomes a bigger icon; this can’t hurt.
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Dill Scallion

A mixed reviewed mockumentary, Dill Scallion billed itself as the Spinal Tap of Country Music. The protagonist, Dill Scallion was a dimwitted bus driver turned superstar, turned bum again. The film wasn’t bad, but it was barely seen and when you refer to yourself as the version of something else, you have to wonder aloud how good you can really be. The Bullet Points: Movies Appeared: Dill Scallion (1999) Actor: Billy Burke Songs you might remember: Probably none Why you should vote for him: The film actually wasn’t bad, with an interesting cast. Why you should not vote for him:…
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Dingoes Ate my Baby

From what is one of our favorite TV shows, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the werewolf character of “Oz” was the leader of one of the coolest band names of all time (real or fictitious), “Dingoes ate my Baby”. We heard them periodically, but were their music relevant to make a difference here? It didn’t, but again, we are a sucker for the name of this band. The Bullet Points: TV Show Appeared: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1996-99) Actors: Seth Green (Oz) And we have no idea who else made this band Songs you might remember: Shadows Why you should vote…
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Dirk Diggler

If we ever do a Fictitious Porn Star Hall of Fame (and we are not planning to) the inaugural inductee would have to be Dirk Diggler. As we are not, you may have forgotten that Dirk qualifies for the Fictitious Rock and Roll Hall of Fame when he did an abysmal song, The Touch, which might have been better had the vocals been featured more prominently as he requested. Of course, we never did get a chance to see if he would have made it as the “magic” remained in the studios when they failed to pay for the recording…
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DJ Lance Rock

Although we don’t have kids, we would think that if we did we would be cool if they watched DJ Lance Rock of Yo Gabba Gabba on Nickelodeon. Maybe we are biased because actual bands appear on the show, and that it does not seem condescending towards kids. We are very curious to see if this gains any traction at all.    The Bullet Points: Movies Appeared: Yo Gabba Gabba (2007-) Actor: Lance Robertson Songs you might remember: None Why you should vote for him: We can’t imagine there is a candidate from a modern kids show who is better…
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DJay

You would not think that Pimp/Dealer looking for a Rap career would be a solid candidate, but we think it should be. That was the plot in “Hustle & Flow” which starred Terrance Howard as the aspiring Rapper. It was a complex and deep role, which at its core was about a man trying to make a better life for himself, and the film was done so well that you don’t need to be a Hip Hop fan to relate. Howard was nominated for an Oscar, and the signature song from the movie “It’s Hard Out There For A Pimp”…
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Doc Jenkins

Based on his own life, “Songwriter” is the story of Doc Jenkins, a Country music star who battles for control of his own music. Nelson never strays from his range, and as such never fails and though this movie never found an audience, it is an underrated effort worth a look.
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Dogs

We only saw this once, and in our eyes this is one of the great “what ifs” of Saturday Night Live. We have always wondered if the Adam Sandler led “Dogs” which appeared in the final sketch in the Tom Arnold hosted show of the eighteenth season, could have been like a Blues Brothers and have a much greater life, or was it only meant to be a one note joke? Perhaps there was something about a Grunge band with a Dog motif that appealed to us, or maybe it was the potential of this great group of comedians that…
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Dogs in Space

We will admit that we have little reason to think that Dogs in Space will enter the Fictitious Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. We also will admit that they are only here because INXS front man, Michael Hutchence was in it. The skinny is that this is a 1987 Australian film set in the 1978 Melbourne “Little Band Scene” and Hutchence plays the lead singer of the band, although the fans of the music receive equal time in this flick. The Bullet Points: Movies Appeared: Dogs in Space (1987) Actors: Michael Hutchence (Sam) Nique Needles (Tim) Songs you might…
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Don "No Soul" Simmons

In one of the more memorable sketches from the 1987 film, “Amazon Women on the Moon” David Alan Grier was Don “No Soul” Simmons who turned his disability of being a Black without Soul into a successful white bread recording career. Simmons would take “white” songs and well…make them even whiter as he took tunes like “Tie a Yellow Ribbon” to even new lows.   The Bullet Points: Movie Appeared: Amazon Women on the Moon (1987) Actor: David Alan Grier Songs you might remember: Tie a Yellow Ribbon Blame it on the Bossanova Why you should vote for him: We don’t…
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